Bhavesh's Tryst

Little poems & notes created to break the mudane

Monday, April 30, 2012

 

ULTIMATE LAUGHTER

 

 

Enjoy……

Height of Diplomacy-There, but yet not there...

Height of being Mobile-Today's Generation...



Height of Technology- Today's Shaving Youth...




Height of Addiction-Beer, Beer, Beer...OH Dear...




Height of Facebooking-No time to sleep...




Height of Political Reaction-What an Item Number Sirjee...




Height of Smartness- Love Proposal or Supporting the Cause...




Height of Update-Always Linkedin through Facebook...




Height of Love-Rejection & Acceptance...




Height of Selection-Being Futuristic




Height of Differences-Men & Women...as always...







Height of Sacrifice-Whether Humans or Clothes...




Height of using English-Whether YES or No...




& the Ultimate One...
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Height of Height-One & only our own Rajni Sir...



      


 

Private Organisation

 

Good One!!!

                       


 

Life of Kaushal after Being Fired from Microsoft-----------

 

Hello Friends

 

 

 

 

NOTE:CHARACTERS IN THIS STORY ARE REAL AND RESEMBLANCE TO ANYONE’S LIFE IS NOT A COINCIDENCE.

 

This is Kaushal Choudhary. Don't be surprised by hearing his name just because it sounds like the name of some decent guy like us. In fact, he is one of us who was a software engineer by profession.
     Kaushal graduated from one of the reputed engineering colleges in 2005 with lots of dreams in his eyes to make it big in software industry. He got selected in Infosys by campus placement as he was among the  toppers. In fact, he worked his brains out , day and night, chasing deadlines and all just to make it big. For initial 2 years of his career he worked like nuts just to achieve his dream.
    He forgot everything which young guys normally dreams for, bikes,cars,mobiles,girls.... He was only after his dream to climb the corporate ladder.
He used to come early in the office, leave late(Sometimes even slept in the office premises somewhere)...Many times he used to work on weekends. His manager was very impressed and used to appreciate on mails like "you are an asset to the project".
 
And after 2 years of his career , he did what we guys normally do i.e. SWITCH THE COMPANY.
In fact, he was lot better than 95% of us. He got selected in
MICROSOFT. That was the day when he had tears in his eyes.

But he also knew that it was not his destination. His only dream was to be on the top in software.

  Winning is an habit , and Kaushal's habit of performing well, late night stays, chasing deadlines, back to back meetings, deliveries and all didn't leave him and one day his manager awarded him with VIP award and gave him PRECIOUS MICROSOFT T-SHIRT(YELLOW COLOUR). And he immediately got attached to that MICROSOFT logo t-shirt and that he started wearing it every FRIDAY in the office.

He made sure that he wears that
MICROSOFT t-shirt on weekends whenever he goes out for movies, dinners and all.

And one day, something happened that shaked everybody.... AND who doesn't know that. First news of Banks going bankrupt came and then guess what....

SOFTWARE JOBS ARE NO MORE SECURE....

At this moment, KAUSHAL's manager called him in his cubicle and asked him to Return back his
MICROSOFT T-SHIRT.

KAUSHAL asked his PM, BUT WHY?
PM: Because you are fired.
KAUSHAL: Shocked,(As he never imagined)... But Sir, i was doing my job well
PM: I know but company can't afford you and doing cost cutting
KAUSHAL: But sir it was my dream to work in Microsoft
PM: I appreciate
KAUSAL: (Crying) I will never leave
MICROSOFT
PM: But you have to
KAUSHAL: But i will not
PM: Ok , do one thing , keep
MICROSOFT t-shirt but you have to leave
KAUSHAL: Happily gave his resignation but decided not to work in software anymore and decided to wear
MICROSOFT t-shirt everyday of his life till he dies


NOW, KAUSHAL was seen working for a TEA-VENDOR near kalyani nagar,IT cerebrum park,Pune wearing
MICROSOFT t-shirt . One caring and compassionate Software professional ,seeing Microsoft employee in this condition offered him TEA and clicked him just to make him happy again in life. It made him happy too. He was still wearing that golden MICROSOFT t-shirt just to teach other software professionals a lesson and to let them know that NOTHING IS PERMANENT IN LIFE. IF I CAN BE FIRED THEN YOU CAN BE:):):)

Moral of this story: Never keep all your eggs in one basket. Always create options in life, otherwise TEA Stalls are waiting for us.

 

 

 

 

" Happy = Having A Positive Perspective (about) Yourself ".

 

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Some don'ts after a meal

Some don’ts after a meal

Don’t drink tea – Because tea leaves contain a high content of acid. This substance will cause the Protein content in the food we consume to be hardened thus difficult to digest.

Don’t bathe – Bathing will cause the increase of blood flow to the hands, legs & body thus the amount of blood around the stomach will therefore decrease. This will weaken the digestive system in our stomach.

Don’t walk about – People always say that after a meal walk a hundred steps and you will live till 99. In actual fact this is not true. Walking will cause the digestive system to be unable to absorb the nutrition from the food we intake.

Don’t sleep immediately – The food we intake will not be able to digest properly. Thus will lead to gastric & infection in our intestine.


 

SOAP Case study ... !!!

Soap Box Case Study

 

One of the most memorable case studies on Japanese management was the case of the empty soap box, which happened in one of Japan's biggest cosmetics companies.

The company received a complaint that a consumer had bought a soap box that was empty.

 

Immediately the authorities isolated the problem to the assembly line, which transported all the packaged boxes of soap to the delivery department.

 

For some reason, one soap box went through the assembly line empty. Management asked its engineers to solve the problem.

 

Post-haste, the engineers worked hard to devise an X-ray machine with high-resolution monitors manned by two people to watch all the soap boxes that passed through the line to make sure they were not empty.

 

No doubt, they worked hard and they worked fast but they spent whoopee amount to do so.

 

But when a rank-and-file employee in a small company was posed with the same problem, did not get into complications of X-rays, etc but instead came out with another solution.

He bought a strong industrial electric fan and pointed it at the assembly line. He switched the fan on, and as each soap box passed the fan, it simply blew the empty boxes out of the line.

 

Moral of the story: KISS (Keep It Simple, Stupid) i.e. always look for simple solutions. Devise the simplest possible solution that solves the problem So, learn to focus on solutions not on problems.

 

 


 

Wake up

 

  1. TATAs took 100 years to become billionaire, Ambanis took 50 years(after utilizing all its resources), where as Robert Vadra took less than 10 years to become fastest multi billionaire.
  1. All newspapers are scared to discuss the story of Robert Vadra because of severe threat from Sonia Gandhi and Congress govt.
  1. After Robert Vadra got married with Priyanka Gandhi, Robert's father committed suicide under mysterious circumstances, his brother found dead in his delhi residence and his sister found dead in mysterious car accident. These reports were not published in any Indian media.
  1. He is having stakes in Malls in premier locations of India, he is having stakes in DLF IPL, and DLF itself. He was involved in CWG corruption - DLF was responsible for development of Commonwealth games, and Kalmadi gave favoritism to DLS because of Robert Vadra's direct interest and business partnership with DLF.
  1. Robert Vadra owns many Hilton Hotels including Hilton
    Gardens New Delhi
  1. Robert Vadra's association with Kolkata Knight Ryders has never been reported by Indian media
  1. He has 20% ownership in Unitech, Biggest beneficiary ownership of 2G Scam. Because of Robert's involvement in this scam, there are concerns that investigation would never reach decisive conclusion
  1. He owns prime property in India specially commercial hubs, and taxi business but for Air Taxi. He owns few private planes as well.
  1. He has direct link with Italian businessman Quatrochi.

WAKE UP DESHBHAKT INDIANS! FIGHT AGAINST CORRUPTION!

 

Please forward to all your friends.

 

"Life is not always what we want it to be, but to make the best of it, as it is, is the only way of being happy"

 

 


 

difference between 'complete' and 'finished'

 No English dictionary has been able to explain the difference between
 the two words 'complete' and 'finished' in a way that's so easy to
 understand:

 Some people say there is no difference between COMPLETE & FINISHED but

 there is:

 When you marry the right one, you are COMPLETE....

 And when you marry the wrong one, you are FINISHED.....

 And when the right one catches you with the wrong one, you are ...
 COMPLETELY FINISHED !!!


Saturday, April 28, 2012

 

real world

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Auto Indica !

 

 

Very True !

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

BEANAVATAR !

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


Thursday, April 26, 2012

 

Say no to water between meals:

Say no to water between meals: Most Indians have water along with their meals. People have no idea how wrong this practice is and how difficult this can be for their digestion. Our stomachs have a knack of knowing when you will eat and starts releasing digestive juices immediately. If you start drinking water at the same time, what you are actually doing is diluting the digestive juices being released to digest your food, thereby hindering them from breaking down food. Drinking water with meals can also cause a surge in insulin levels, almost like the way high glycemic food would affect.

Research shows that sipping a little water during meals is not a cause for concern but drinking a glass or two may interfere with digestion. It is best to drink fluids before and two hours after meals as this helps in absorption of nutrients, researchers have found.

 


 

Hilarious Comments in Sachin's 100

 

1. Digvijay Singh – Sachin is an RSS agent. All these days he was waiting to score his century against a Muslim country.

 

2. Manmohan Singh – I congratulate Sachin and also appreciate leadership of Shrimati Sonia Gandhi.

 

3. Rahul Gandhi – My grandmother created Bangladesh. She deserves the credit for this century.

 

4. Raj Thakrey – Sachin has proved himself to be a true Marathi Manus after scoring this century. So what if India has lost, Maharashtrianscan not take the responsibility of the whole nation

5. Mulayam Singh Yadav – If Sachin was from UP, I would have made tickets of all Cricket matches 'Tax free'.

 

6. Anna Hazare – Sachin deserves to be the next lokpal of the country. 

 

7. Baba Ramdev – If you multiply all the runs Sachin has made by a billion is what is the total black money in foreign country.

 

8. Kapil Sibbal – Social media need to control comments on Sachin's century. It will harm the fabric of secularism in India.

 

9. Swami Agnivesh – Now that Bangladesh has helped Sachin score his 100th century, they have proved to be a true friend of India. Letswelcome their citizens to India and let them live wherever they can.Let us issue them Voter's ID cards

 

10. Kris Shrikant – We selectors hope that by 2050, Sachin will also score his 150th century.

 

11. Arjun Tendulkar – I want to play with my father in 2020 world cup. 

 

12. Sachin Tendulkar himself – Aaeellaaaa…. Now what excuse I will make to not retire.

 

13. Sonia Gandhi – Er….. She did not respond since she is suffering from an undisclosed disease.

 

14. Karunanidhi.......Who is Sachin Tandulkar? 

 

15. Jayalalitha.....Sometimes Sashikala could have been right. She said something about this guy. I ignored it as I thought that he was aBollywood filmstar...In any case Dr. MGR was a better player.


 

KENYA


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