Bhavesh's Tryst

 

This is Serious! A woman went boating one Sunday taking with her some cans of coke which she put into the refrigerator of the boat.  On Monday she was taken to the hospital and placed in the Intensive Care Unit. She died on Wednesday. The autopsy concluded she died of Leptospirosis.  This was traced to the can of coke she drank from, not using a glass.  Tests showed that the can was infected by dried RAT urine and  hence the disease Leptospirosis.  RAT urine contains toxic and deathly substances.  It is highly recommended to thoroughly wash the upper part of all soda cans before drinking out of them.  The cans are typically stocked in warehouses and transported straight to the shops without being cleaned. A study at NYCU showed that the tops of all soda cans are more contaminated than public toilets (i.e.). full of germs and bacteria. So wash them with water beforeputting them to the mouth to avoidany kind of fatal accident.  Please forward this message to all the people you care about. I JUST Did

posted by Bhavesh Jhaveri  # 1:22 PM 0 Comments

Friday, June 22, 2012

 

Sardar Jokes Are Outdated-- Read Some Petrol Jokes

Sardar jokes are now outdated--read some petrol jokes

 

History (for this Black Day) will say:

When the government was robbing the country,

The Indians were busy in watching IPL (!)

 

New Greetings:

May your happiness increase like Petrol Price,

May your sorrow fall like Indian Rupee, and

May your joy fill your heart like corruption in India…!!!

 

Congress is fulfilling its promise, when they said: GDP will rise this year.

The only thing we forgot to ask him its full form:

G= Gas & Gold

D= Diesel & Dollar

P= Petrol & Penny

 

Pleasure & Pain come at the same price: Rs.80/- for a Beer Bottle OR 1 Litre Petrol.

Decision is yours… झूम लो, या घूम लो.!!!

 

All Girls' Dream come True!

All Girls' Dream Boys will come on horse!

All thanks to the Petrol Price Hike!

 

Dear Father-in-Law,

I deeply regret taking a Car in dowry.

Please take your Daughter or Car back…

I cannot afford both.

 

Now Tata Nano's fuel cost will be more than its EMI per month!

 

Soon, Rupee will be SENIOR CITIZEN (above Rs.60 per US Dollar);

Petrol has already become VERY SENIOR CITIZEN in Bangalore (Rs.81 per litre) !!!

 

Finally it has happened…

After decades,

Beer is now cheaper than petrol !!!

Now, there will be new slogan: JUST DRINK; DON'T DRIVE !!!

 

Expensive petrol will help solve the problem of traffic jams!

 

Drink and drive should not be a problem now.

After all, how many will be able to afford alcohol and petrol on the same day?

 

We have the world's cheapest car and the world's costliest petrol. रिकॉर्ड बन गया!!!

 

Sign board at Petrol pump: Buy Petrol worth Rs. 20,000 and get a TATA nano absolutely free.

(scheme for आम आदमी  Now he can get car with petrol! )

 

Good News!!!

Please forward this to MAXIMUM people you know, शायद किसी को काम आ जाए:

जिसको petrol Rs.17/- per litre चाहिए,

वो इस petrol pump से जा कर ले ले:

…

…

Al Safa Petroleum

Al Khair Road

Muscat, Oman

 

Man at Petrol Pump: Full tank कर दो...

Attendant: Sir, PAN Card की copy दो...

Man: What? Why? How?

Attendant: Sir, it's a HIGH VALUE TRANSACTION !!!

 

Petrol price hiked by Rs.7.50 per litre…

और करो संता-बंता के jokes!

देखा, सरदार का revenge..!!

 

Harbhajan to Dhoni: हम तो जानबूझ के मैच हारे है... पता है की जीतनेवाली टीम को Volkswagon मिलने वाली है, और वो petrol की है...!!!

 

Amitabh Bachchan has decided to take all his payments in Dollars…

Because……….

वो आज भी गिरे हुए पैसे नहीं उठाता...!!!

 

Dharmendra's new dialogue:

... kutte kaminey  main तेरी गड्डी का पेट्रोल पी जाऊंगा...

 

Beti: Mom, He is JUST A FRIEND!

Mom: हमने दुनिया देखि है, बेटी... 2 लीटर पेट्रोल जलाके घर आने वाला कभी JUST FRIEND नहीं होता...

 

Petrol Pump Attendant: कितने का डालूँ?

Grahak: 50 ML गाडी पे स्प्रे कर दे भाई, आग लगानी है...

 

Dear Rupee,

तुम मेरे प्यार में इतना गिर जाओगे,

ये मैंने सपने में भी नहीं सोचा था...

~तुम्हारा Dollar

 

रामचंद्र कहे गए सिया से, ऐसा कलयुग आएगा,

कार कैश पे लेगा हर कोई, पेट्रोल लोन से भरवाएगा...!!

posted by Bhavesh Jhaveri  # 12:26 PM 0 Comments

Sunday, June 17, 2012

 

ખોટી ધારણાઓ

માણસની પાંચ ખોટી ધારણાઓ તેને આખી જિંદગી દુ:ખી કરવા માટે પૂરતી છે : (1) મારી મહેનત કરતાં મને ઓછું મહેનતાણું મળે છે અને મારું શોષણ થાય છે ! (2) મારી લાગણીઓને કોઈ સમજતું  નથી અને મારી વાત કોઈ સાંભળતું નથી ! (3) મારા કામની કોઈ કદર કરતુ નથી અને મને યશ મળતો નથી ! (4) મેં હંમેશાં બધાને મદદ કરી છે અને હવે મારે જરૂર છે ત્યારે મને કોઈ મદદ કરતું નથી ! અને (5) મારો કોઈ દોષ નથી હોતો અને છતાં મારો જ વાંક કાઢવામાં આવે છે ! આ પાંચેય ધારણાઓમાં આપણે આપણા દુ:ખ માટે "બીજાને" જવાબદાર માનીએ છીએ.એક વાત યાદ રાખજો , માણસ જયારે પોતાના સુખને"પરાધીન" બનાવી દે છે, ત્યારે તેને "પીડાધીન" બનતાં ભગવાન પણ અટકાવી શક્તો નથી !!

 

posted by Bhavesh Jhaveri  # 2:24 PM 0 Comments

Monday, June 11, 2012

 

Nostalgic Pictures (India)

 

Some nostalgic pictures - A rarity to have - Needs to be preserved!           15th August 1947, First News Paper of INDEPENDENT INDIA…   DAIRY MILK CHOCOLATE 1905 TO 1999…   Stalin, Lenin and Trotsky…   An Awesome paint of Leonardo da vinci…   The front page of the April 16, 1912 evening edition of the Boston Globe, detailing the Titanic Disaster is shown…   The Elephant Rock - 1858…   Star Cinema ( now at Pakistan ) 1943…   Shooting-the-mgm-lion-logo-in-1924…   Incomplete Howrah bridge 1935…   Howrah Bridge under construction... 1942...   HOWRAH BRIDGE…   Calcutta bus stand near Howrah bridge, most likely on the Howrah station side of the Hooghly River 1944…   view of the hoogly river at 1880…     Last time Netaji was arrested by British police…   A rare one of Netaji Subhash Chandra Bose and his wife Eimilie Shenkl…   Gandhi ji with his wife Kasturba Gandhi…   the crown of India…   Maharani of Jaipur Gayatri Devi - 1940's…   The last train , Dhaka to Calcutta!!! Taken in 1947…   British India and Afghanistan border - 1934…   Gandhi-ji with Netaji 1932…   Jawaharlal Nehru, Bhulabhai Desai, and Rajendra Prasad (Center) at the AICC Session, April 1939…   Chatim talay gurudeber janmodin 1937…   Rabindranath Thakur…   Sharat Chandra with Surendranath…   Bagha Jatin…   deho rakhchen thakur ramkrishna paramahansa deb…   rare picture of the family of maa sarada devi…   1968 shayam bazar more…     Family of Indira Gandhi…   July 1983  Indira Gandhi felicitates Kapil Dev, captain of Indian cricket team…   Satyajit Roy only 22 years old , picture taken at 1943…   Asha, Mukesh , Lata , Kishore & Manna…   rare picture of Kishore kumar & Bhupen Hazarika…   awesome picture of RK, dilip sahab and Dev anand…   Amit ji with his mom Teji bachan....   Jaya with her son & daughter…   Final Journey to Heaven.....Bhupen Hazarika…     C. V. Raman - The Great Indian Physicist Sir Chandrasekhara Venkata Raman, FRS (7 November 1888 – 21 November 1970) was an Indian physicist. He was the recipient of the Nobel Prize for Physics in 1930 for the discovery that when light traverses a transparent material, some of the light that is deflected changes in wavelength. This phenomenon is now called Raman scattering and is the result of the Raman effect…     The original picture of Jhansi Rani Laxmi Bai. This picture has been taken by German photographer Hoffman 160 years ago…     This was how the Taj Mahal was protected from bomber jets in 1942 during world war. It was covered with huge scaffold, to make it look like a stockpile of bamboo and misguide bombers. The covering is still incomplete in this photo. The whole of Taj Mahal was covered but this picture shows only the main dome covered. The govt. didn’t allow any photographers later to shoot the final scaffold cover. During the India-Pakistan war in 1971, it was protected by covering it with a green cloth and making it almost invisible i.e. camouflaged within the greenery around it. Even in 2001, after the Sep 11 attack, Archaeological Survey of India took up the precautionary measure to cover it with cloth and it took them more than 20 days to do that!!

posted by Bhavesh Jhaveri  # 6:06 AM 0 Comments

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